another grace ;) praise Lord

haaaaaaaalllllllllloooooooooooooo semuanya :) hehehehhe saya sedang sendiri di rumah semuanya kegereja :( eh tapi gue udah gereja pagi" hehehehe terus pulang tidur lagi dan sekarang saya sedang mengerjakan PR bahasa jermannya si Frau Niken cuman nyambi lah nulis blog nyeheheheeee ehiyaaa life's changing a lil bit wonderful loooh.. mulai hari ini gue udah ikut club tennis lagi.. since 2 years vakum hehehe masih sangat berniat dan mesti kurus ini selama SMA!!!! ehiya kemaren hari sabtu bangun pagi" gue udah di kagetkan dengan kabar yang begitu membahagiakan pertama dari Ali dia ping berkali" nah gue kebangun dengan mata yg masih sayu gue rada kesel dong orang lagi enak" tidur di bangunin... pas baca chatnya dia eh tau" dia ngmngin CIBI tp msh samar" pas baca lg dia blg 'ivannaaaaa Lo ketrima cibi :D' dan gue awalnya gak percaya... setelah itu ada bbm dr kania isinya 'ivanna selamat ya ketrima CIBI :*' masih agak gak percaya terus buka twitter eh udah ada mention dari si gila patrissss menyelamatkan lg.. hm yah masih takut mereka keliru tapi yg satu ini dapet bbm dr luthfi yg bukan temen sekelas gue dia blg 'selamat ya ketrima cibi van' gue spontan nnaya tau dr mana dia blg td di bacain woaaaaah gila lngsng seneng bgt gada ampun... I'LL END MY SENIOR HIGH SCHOOL YEARS IN 2 YEARS :D:D wohoooo Tuhan itu baik sekali... padahal gue udh pnya feeling ga ketrma dan indahnya gue gak tau hr apa pengumuman jd gue gak se deg"an yg parah" bgt heehehe yeah but this is just another beginning masuk CIBI itu gak gampang apalagi kalo udah di CIBI belajar harus ekstra lg hhh i know i may through it with my God and those support from people around me.... yeah doakan yaaa :) FKUI 2013 would be on me ;) yeah mungkin dengan ini juga i don't have any time for that stupid thing called romance.... yeah and anyway i know tme heals... even if i need some more seconds, minutes, hours, days, months or even years ;) Good has his own plan for me :) sekian, terimakasih :D

a little story of mine....

hallooo semua... sangkin bingungnya mau ngapain akhirnya gue memutuskan untuk menulis blog dan bercerita tentang berbagai hal :) and yeh i'm officially an utas in hujut hulup nangulub-_- school life isn't easy anymore, i didnt mean the subjects... pelajaran sih as far gak ada yg bkin stress" bgt... but those creature astaga ga bisa ngomong lagi.. berbahagialah kawan" yang mempunya sekolah dengan senioritas yang bisa di bilang tidak ada.... sangat teramat susah sekali meyakinkan diri sendiri bahwa satu tahun tidak lah lama... i have to cheer myself up everynight and every morning because i'm just to affraid going to school and meet my seniors :| kejadian di sekolah banyak bgt... gak mungkin di ceritain disini.. dan apalagi hal yg terjadi jumat lalu.. sukses bikin gue trauma dan entah kuat ke sekolah senin atau enggak, you may say i'm 'lebay' but you on't know how hard it is being an utas cause you're not.... dan bagaimanapun pihak" ngelarang cerita" ke siapa aja gue tetep setia bercerita sama mamaku tercinta and you know what... she asked me to move hellyeah gue langsung seneng... tapi sangat bergumul karena gue masih nunggu pengumuman CIBI... gue bener" punya feeling gue ga diterima :( sedih bgt ye, tapi it's good cause i've prepared my self for the worst even i still hope for the best :) yah bsa di bilang cuman ada 2 pilihan 'hello CIBI' atau 'goodbye 70 bulungan' :D just see later.. dan kehidupan di rumah opung, tinggal sama 2 tante dan 1 om tidak lah terlalu sepi... karena gue juga udah sibuk pulang skolah hrus les.. atau kadang kalo gak les tidur dulu bangun lngsng belajar... jadi even i dont have any brothers or sisters there to share with gue juga udah disibukkan... dan yeaaaah aku sudah besar lohhh pagi" sih msh di anter skolah tapi i go home naik bus \m/ ke les dan pulang skolah hehehe yah capek hrus jalan jauh juga but anyway siapa tau gue bsa kurus hahahahahahaa dan sekarang udah gapernah berantem sama mama lagi hehe ya gimana enggak tiap hari dia bbm cman bilang kangen blablabla trus kalo balik ke rumah ya di ajak jalan".. trus skrg juga dia makin baik... udah bebas aja pergi" mau kemana aja mau ampe jem brapa aja hehe kasian kali ya sama gue senin-kamis tersiksa cman bsa skolah-les-belajar D: gak taudeh mau crita apalagi hehehe may be it's enough...... bye :D

"I wish I could see through your eyes so I would know what you like to see. I wish I knew your wishes, so I could give you everything you want. I wish I dreamed the same dreams you do, and together we could make them come true. I wish I knew what makes you happy, so I could make you the happiest person in the whole world. And lastly, I wish I were a cell in your blood, so I would be sure I was somewhere in your heart." 

don't regret your relationship w your ex, you've choosen him/her, tho at the end you feel she/he's not the one you need for life, they actually gave sth for you to learn and make yourself a better person :)

cause a relationship isn't a game, think mature, if your couple was so in love with you but then you're not serious with it, you're breaking someone's heart. i mean being in a relationship wasn't an entertainment, but it's a way which 2 people come together as one filling each others flaws and backing each other up when they're having a problem :) not all pretty girl you meet everyday can fill you and not all handsome boy you're crazy with can always be there for you, know them well, know their heart then you may know whether they're the best/not ;;) old phrase : 'don't judge a book by it's cover' ;)

love without reason is the everlasting one, somehow i was agree :) if you love someone with one reason even millions how if those fact fade away, ex: i love him because he's kind so then when he's being a jerk then you stop loving him? it wasn't 'love' it's much like 'like' cause when you love someone you'll love anything in him even their flaws, i mean you can try to change him/her but truthfully that wasn't easy to remove our flaws that's why even if they can't change you have to accept them and fill their flaws with your excellence :) you need to know your couple well and understand each other :)

and then remember, if you really love someone don't give up on him/her, HOLD ON! you deserve him/her and she/he also deserves you as well :) and even if they break you, love will heal itself and continue its journey to get that special person whether by waiting or fight for it, all you need is faith and beliefs :)

Promise me that you'll stand by me forever. But if God forbid fate should step in and force us into a goodbye.
Someday, you'll have your own children, when they point to our pictures, please tell them my name, tell them how I hope they're ours, tell them that we used to be the happiest couple& build our dreams together.

end of the road - BOYZ2MEN

boy you know we belong together
I have no time for you to be playing
With my heart like this
You’ll be mine forever baby, you just see

We belong together
And you that I’m right
Why do you play with my head,
Hy do you play with my mind? 

Said we’d be forever
Said it’d never die
How could you love me and leave me
And never say good-bye? 

boy I can’t sleep at night without holding you tight
boy, each time I try I just break down and cry
Pain in my head oh I’d rather be dead
Spinnin’ around and around


Chorus:
Although we’ve come to the end of the road
Still I can’t let you go
It’s unnatural, you belong to me, I belong to you
Come to the end of the road
Still I can’t let you go
It’s unnatural, you belong to me, I belong to you


boy, I know you really love me,
You just don’t realize
You’ve never been there before
It’s only your first time

Maybe I’ll forgive you, hmm
Maybe you’ll try
We should be happy together
Forever, you and i

will you love me again like you loved me before
This time I want you to love me much more
This time instead just come to my bed
And baby just don’t let me, don’t let me down


boy I’m here for you
All those times of night when you just hurt me
And just run out with that other fella
Baby I knew about it, I just didn’t care
You just don’t understand how much I love you do you? 
I’m here for you

I’m not out to go out and cheat on you all night
Just like you did baby but that’s all right
Hey, I love you anyway
And I’m still gonna be here for you ’till my dying day baby
Right now, I’m just in so much pain baby
Coz you just won’t come back to me
Will you? just come back to me

(lonely)
Yes baby my heart is lonely
(lonely)
My heart hurts baby
(lonely)
Yes I feel pain too
Baby please

This time instead just come to my bed
And baby just don’t let me go

a little story of my life..

heeey i'm back :) udah lama ya gak nulis blog, sebenernya rencananya udah lama pengen cerita", malah tadinya mau nunda sampe hari rabu malem tapi hari ini gabisa tidur ya jadinya nulis aja deh :) mulai dari masalah sekolah yaa. minggu lalu eh 2 minggu lalu, pas hari pertama UN pulangnya gue daftar online di 70, terus pas hari apa ya? jumatnya setelah selesai UN gue verifikasi berkas. nah sabtu minggu depannya kan pengumuman, gue udah bener" takut, apa gue lolos verifikasi apa engga. eh tau"nya lulus :) nah terus selasa-rabunya gue tes disana ya well disana sekolahnya such good as GS, belnya mirip, gedungnya juga mirip malah sbnernya lebih besar hehe tp toiletnya hmmmmmm that's one my dislikes, and also bangku dan meja yg masih pake kayu, tapi semua full AC. nah hari pertama tesnya itu MAT & IPS :) hr kedua IPA&BI you guys will totally shocked kalau liat soalnya, hmm standarnya di atas UN jauh dan mirip" sama soal penabur bisa dibilang potensinya sama. nah well selama gue ujian gue tinggal di rumah opung hehe rumah gue kalau seandainya jadi masuk situ! (AMIIIIN!) and ada cerita yg sedih... opung boru gue dari bokap msuk RS lagi...... and kali ini karena dia kanker rahim :(:( tapi pas hari kamis udah di operasi :) and now everything's fine. pas hari jumatnya tgl 13/05 gue jagain dia di RS, gue nginep disana, tadinya rencananya kan hr sbtu gue mau liat pengumuman di 70 langsung . pas besok paginya gue udah kesana tuh naik taksi tapi sialnya kagak di pasang malah disuru liat di web. nahyaaa gue udah sangat" ketakutan harap-harap cemas! gue langsung telfon nyokap dan suru dia liat hehe dia pake lama lagi. tp dan ternyata gue LOLOS! urutan 51 dr 352 hehe :) PUJI TUHAN bgt! terus kan daya tampung maks buat anak luar 16 org nah yg lolos seleksi 16, emang nih Jakarta pelit ngsh daya tampung-_- tapi gue berdoa bgt biar gue bsa ngerjain TOEFL prediction gue hari rabu hehe :) ohya mau tau nilai guekah? BI 85 MAT 90 IPA 77,5 IPS 78 not that good but well if tried my best lah ;) soal gue diterima / enggaknya nanti itu semua rencana Tuhan, nyokap gue selalu mengajarkan kita untuk berserah berserah dan berserah. karena rencana Tuhan itu jauh lebih baik dari rancana manusia :)

dan hal k2 yg pengen gue ceritain itu ttg seseorang yg sangat teramat salah gue nilai! yeah girl i should know from the start that you're not that type of bestfriend i need. hmmm mungkin gue ini orangnya terlalu sensitif atau apa tapi gimana ya gue udah capek pendem, capek sakit hati jadi mending gue gausah temenan lagi sama dia, itu yang gue putusin, soal gue sekamar sm dia di bali ya apa boleh buat, biarkanlaaah..........

the last but not least, something made me really happy, well someone realized me something, that someone showed me that ....... *maksutnya titik" itu sesuatunya itu* and that's why i'm still holding on ummm even if i was upset because of........... but i choose to over think about the positive side not the negative one. and well i believe if we're meant to be sooner or later God will make the way............ and this time i really miss that someone, i really wish he could be here i miss his voice his arms his 'kebawelan' and this is funny but most of them i miss OUR FIGHTS :') the point is I MISS EVERYTHING ABOUT THAT SOMEONE! ISLYSM <3:D